. . . .

today is the 13th day that i am here.
technically the 10th day since i opened my books.
yesterday was the 1st day i went to visit the hospital.


met up with the guy. had a look ard the hospital.
was told i cld do some shadowing.
that's probably the most exciting news ive had so far.


sits 12hrs per day, on a chair, in front of the lappy.
a feat ive never ever done in my 28yrs of my life.
minus the mins i take for breaks, showers, cooking, meals..
i probably spend like 10hrs on my books.


weather's getting hotter everyday.
i'm still perspiring sitting under a strong blowing fan.
the heat gets me all uncomfortable n easily distracted.
easily irritable. easily demoralized.


i spend hours reading and doing.
yet im always discouraged n disappointed by the test marks.
i tried hard. i tried my best.
ive not much issue with stand alone questions.
but when the passages come, i mess up big time.
how to solve this?
how to get around this weakness?


im not giving up just yet.
but im getting tired.
it's draining mentally and emotionally.
give me cool weather.
give me some light.
give me some hope.
give me a miracle.
give me a rainbow.


i will keep trying.
just keep going.
it can be done.


c'mon, don't give up now.


. . . .